30/12
Sunday, December 31, 2006 @ 4:04:00 PM
it all started in the morning, again.
fall-in. report. shit. i actually forgot to count the people then went to report.
stm? counted, went to report again. shit. i actually forgot to find out who is not here. found out, went to report again. shit. sec1 haven't report then i go report. please
lor. he didn't tell me i have to wait till sec1 report then i can report. my fault.
sian. wait for sec1 to report will die.
haiz. once again, i guess soon it will be retribution? *wicked grin* need to be down by 8. in the end, when i report, it was 808.
nvm.
tekaning was over? phew!
blahblahblah. the sec3s were spilt into 2? half joined us, half joined the sec2s.
becky took them. i seriously think
someone's brain is somehow cocked up. how can
becky take such a big contingent.
someone's brain is not working. sadly. phew! there was no rehearsal. the parade was rather short too, i guess. who will be the next
cca in-charge?
5minutes break. slack a bit then someone came to scold. well.
everytime? i guess someone is losing our respect for someone. we were forced to go to the hall
FAST. no choice. i reached the hall first, saw blackness everywhere. i think the juniors are a bit funny. either they are
laz to switch on the lights, or they want to fall-in fast, in case we scold them. most probably is second reason.
lalala. i am the sec3 in-charge.
blahblahblah. i saw weird marching and ways to get things. everything is over.
break.
lalala.
emo. big deal. i was marginalised by my fellow female
squadmates.
walao eh.
haha.
kk. i know all of you are just kidding. some people are very serious. very very. very emotional. very very. for more details, please visit another entry: mssgt. fall-in. changed into pt kit. we were shouted at again. well.
everytime? i guess someone is losing our respect for someone.
lalala. we went down to our individual 'workplace'.
art students, please follow our dear art student, masdiyanah (binte jalani) in-charge to our workplace, our art students' banner. szejin came to help us. she is the original in-charge. there is just the communication breakdown with her and ya. it made no sense to us. both are in-charges ;p i drew heart-shaped grass. eh... nono. leaves. haha. [*ms masdiyanah (binte jalani) do not think i am trying to be funny. let me tell you. i think i am funny =p] blahblahblah. lunch time. the time from we changed to lunch break seemed long. very long. we felt as though it was at 2+ 3 when it was lunch.we went to buy paint. came back and lunched. slacked. chit-chatted. about
something. haha.
mr soh threw my rank. mine is supposedly, by rights, higher than his. mine has EXTRA three stripes.
haha. fine. anything
xD touched up on everything.
lalala.
jiahui came to chat with us. or rather
kajiao.
haha. he poked me. my foot. not the sole, which is so gross. he poked my veins and said have feeling. duh. if i were to poke your veins at your hands, also have feeling right. cleared up. went home. tired. did some little teeny weeny bit of homework. packed and sleep.
haha. boring life i guess.
29/12
@ 3:34:00 PM
it all started in the morning.
i woke up at 915, with a WAH. i am going to be late. fine. taxi again. wasted my $5. reached school 10 minutes to 10. phew! i went to check the ava room. oh no! it was occupied by my sec2s for their camp. how? i saw him and explained. he dared to tell me he did not book the room. OMG. can you imagine. dilly dally here and there. discuss about it after 10. so responsible huh. so last-minute. in the end he only talked about the duty list then shut up all the way. shit him la!
lalala. they were so noisy. in the end, everything was more or less settled, except people refused to reply any0ne of us. we have to repeat many times. for the sec3s '07, i guess soon it will be retribution? *wicked grin* blah blah blah. yatch? yacht? fine! whatever. joanna and i just refused to give in. everything is finally over. until the individual amazing race briefing. i am ready to see, how are you going to provide 5 plasters for each group, which is 160 plasters for whole amazing race.
i missed his talk with us but i managed to attend her short talk with a few of us. well, there are many things we cannot control, like their level of enthusiasm and involvement. we can always try to get them in, but the decision still lies in them. i cannot stop people from being car engines, on and off. lalala. everything went on?
i went to have lunch with yvonne, joanna, marissa, becky, huimeng, zhengliang, szejin and siti. lalala. talked and talked non-stop. we saw shu yun. blahblahblah. we talked about
MANY MANY interesting things. in the end, training was half cancelled. fine. stay there also nothing to do. haha. masdiyanah binte jalani was waiting for me in school and i went to bk to study. haha. sorry =D
everything went normal and we went home? haha. anyway, i did not do much homework. days are running short. really
short.it is not that we are trying to be heroes. the problem is, if we do not do it, who will? you? wait till everything falls then.
all that were in the past.
Saturday, December 23, 2006 @ 1:20:00 AM
disappointments. disappointments, followed by disappointments.why must it happen to me? why must it happen to me, not once, not twice?the series of memorable disappointments that happened this year. year 2006, when i am fifteen. young fifteen. oops=xfirstly, it was the election.- there are just too much of information. not convenient to divulge here.
secondly, it was the postings.- there are also too much of information. very inconvenient to say here.
thirdly, it were the promotions.first time round, three passed. roland, jeremy and jai. we were not shocked that roland and jeremy got it. but why jai? the reason is simple. he put in that amount of effort and he passed the criteria- 80%. not biasness, he made it to the criteria. he deserves it, he worked for it.
secong time round, five passed. aaron, jiahui, rahimi, shi yuan and jiajun. i think none of anyone here is very unexpected to pass. they studied for it, they worked for it, they deserves it.
i still did not pass, even after the second re-test. moi. why did i get orienteering? why didn't i get flag-staff? if mas and i have got flag-staff, we would have passed? nevermind. it is already over. all that i can do is, hollow my new boots, polish it, brush up on everything and go for the third re-test. it just seemed so much. third. awful too.
i was really disappointed. when roland told me i failed, i was like, "really? ok lor." i was half wondering if he was lying to me, and the other half of me was thinking of, "how ar? failed twice leh." i put in more effort for this time than the previous. just my moi. like the first time, i went online. i went to talk to jiahui and aaron. we were discussing (half grumbling) to each another for the first test. this time round, i didn't discuss or grumble. i merely said i was really very disappointed.
P.S. my msn pm- all the efforts since sec1. i wonder what i commit myself to. and why i commit myelf to nothing. attendance 100% every year -> meaningful?
anyway, it is only until today i know orienteering is under camp craft. all the while i thought camp craft is only about knots, lashings, lamps and pioneering. i was dumb. i will not be dumb over this again. for other things maybe.
i told myself: "zhuang yi, it is perfectly fine to be disappointed. after disappointment, think about what will be your next step. don't always think about your failure and brood over it. a disappointment is a psychology wound. it is useless to look at the wound and grumble all day. attend to it if needed, and then move on. the crux is, move on. the wound will not disappear if you continue to look at it. cry all you want, cry all you can. after the cryings and regretting, think about what to do next then the planning will be executed. do whatever is needed. no use having big ideas when you do nothing to execute it. no use having the same attitude and thinking as the person you hate. all talk no action. these four words are certainly powerful, powerful enough to lose all the respect for a person. think about the future. people always give up when they are near the finishing line (of course they don't know they are near, if not who will give up?). winners should be persistent to get what they want. people are successful as they are determined to reach their target. i want to be one of them, a successful winner."
singaporeans? human beings?
Tuesday, December 19, 2006 @ 9:23:00 PM
don't you find it
weird when you see elderly folks, handicapped people, pregnant ladies or mothers who are carrying their babies standing on trains or buses?
-i personally find it weird. shouldn't they be offered a seat? it is definitely not considered a privilege for them. i personally feel bad when the above mentioned, do not have a seat when i am comfortably sitting. i will hold it against my conscience, seriously, no joke. i really wonder, how can a person be so selfish so as to see others standing while he/she is comfortably sitting there and be 'blind' to the surroundings?
if you think i am blabbering nonsense so far, you may choose to click on the square which contains a white cross against red background, on the top right hand corner.
alright. some may feel that they paid a good 55cents or above, you can have the privilege to enjoy your bus/train ride to your destination. i would say, it is not wrong. everyone has a right to do something. but the problem lies here, how would you feel? elderly folks have a higher tendency to fall, due to the inertia of the train/bus.
don't you feel guilty when an elderly folk almost fell in front of you and you just sit there and look? in the first place, did you even offer him/her your seat?
don't you feel guilty when a pregnant lady is standing in front of you? you were once in there. won't you hope that someone would offer your mum a seat when she was carrying you in her stomach or even carrying you with her hands?
don't you feel guilty if a handicapped person is struggling not to fall, while you, as a fully-abled person, do something else except caring for the person?
it is just for their safety. you must be thinking, "i care for their safety, who cares about mine?" i would think of it if i am reading this. will you break/fracture your bones if you fall? will you suffer more complications if you do not have a seat? come on. there are better meaningful things to do other than making your money worth by getting a seat and not giving it up to someone who needs it much more than you do.
i wonder if this problem only exists in singapore, or it is just plain human nature to care for themselves to such an extent.
ren bu wei ji, tian zhu di mie. -> understandable if people only care for themselves. people nowadays are enclosing themselves to their comfort zone, only they themself can enter. they refuse others' entries. this over-protective manner is one of the reasons why there are more strangers in the world tha close friends."there are no such thing as strangers. they are friends you have not met." -> i saw this somewhere beside their counter in
khatib mac. i feel, as human beings grow up, they have a tendency to protect themselves against strangers- fear of plots, motives, scheming and even
destruction like terrorists. people will prefer to handle with children- no plots, no motives, no scheming against each other. children are the purest people in the world. they are born, knowing nothing. but as they slowly entered this world, they will start to know what is love, care, concern, responsibility etc. at the same time, they also learn what is hate, how scheme against each other. now can you understand why people will have the protective zone around them?
hmm.
Thursday, December 14, 2006 @ 11:55:00 PM
well, this is my first entry. i really do not know what to say.
this is the place i show off my happiness, vent my anger and share my unhappiness
.Generally, this blog will be all about MY LIFE- including my privacy.
those who are interested, keep coming back to my blog for more unspoken gossips and fugly stuff.